The Interocitor

Illegal Immigration: Solved!

It's not about immigration, they say. It's about illegal immigration. ILLEGAL! It's about sovereignty. It's about children being born as citizens to illegals. It's about illegals getting welfare. It's about citizenship meaning something. It's NOT NOT NOT about the immigrants themselves, their religion, culture, race or language nor is it about being against immigration per se. "No, no, a thousand times no", I hear. I happen to agree with most of these official compaints (except I find the illegals-on-welfare argument weak).

So, here's a solution that solves all these concerns, assuming they're the real ones:

• All illegal immigration is a felony. All illegal immigrants shall be deported after a year and a day in a low-security federal prison camp. All currently illegal residents have 1 month to leave.


• A sizable number of official immigration entry points will be created, some at airports, some at border crossings, or other normal points of entry.


• Anyone who comes to an entry point with a $500 per person processing fee, does not have infectious disease, and has no serious criminal record will be admitted as a legal resident. No numerical or time limits shall be imposed.


• No means-tested federally-funded government benefit shall be granted to any such person until they have attained US citizenship.


• No person born in the United states shall be considered a native-born citizen unless the mother is legally resident.


• No person shall be naturalized unless they can converse in English.

There, solved. Unless, of course, there are issues that are other than sovereignty or legality.

Note that the "anyone can come if they ask permission" rule is hardly new to the USA. Nearly all my Irish and German ancestors used it, so I've got to think it's a pretty good one.

On the other hand, I don't believe a word of it. Most of the oppostion is about immigration, legal or not. It is about race, religion, language, culture. It's about jobs or wages or crowding or other fears. If it were all legal, many would still be opposed. In this, it's the same crap they threw at my ancestors (and theirs for the most part), and the country would be a much poorer place if they had won then.

Or now.

Posted by Kevin Murphy at April 19, 2006 12:31 AM